My Journey (so far) as an Attachment Parent
**disclaimer** I understand the way you parent your child is a very personal choice. Some of my statements may seem harsh but they are my opinion. I really don’t care to hear you “defend” yourselves or if you think what I am doing is wrong. If you disagree with me that is fine. If you truly believe you are doing whats best than this post should not bother you! Oh and to my friends, I have nothing against you! OK?!?
Ok so now that that is over with….
Definition of Attachment Parenting:
from the man himself…..
WE ARE SO LUCK TO HAVE DR SEARS AS GRANT’S PEDIATRICIAN!!!!! WAHOOO!
Now on to MY definition: I parent the way I believe is the natural way to raise a child. Im talking using my primal instincts. I don’t throw Grant into a crib to cry, I don’t prop a bottle into his mouth, and I do not alter him in any way.
I believe in treating babies with respect and as the delicate human beings they are. These last 7 months of being a mommy has been challenging. Since I don’t parent the “easy way” I have been tested harder than ever. There are nights when Grant doesn’t rock or nurse to sleep easier, there are days when he is having a growth spurt and he wont get off the boob, and there are other days when he wont let me put him down. I take a deep breath, remind myself he is a tiny human being (not an inconvenience that needs to be dealt with) and that he is following his instincts that we are all born with. I know that he is programmed to stay with his momma for his survival. Because of this I feel we are more connected on a much deeper level than other kids are with their parents. I treasure that. I treat him with respect, and maybe (hopefully!!!) one day he will treat me with respect back. I plan on using gentle discipline with him and I plan on letting him self wean. I am not going to force my child to do what makes him uncomfortable because quite frankly that makes me uncomfortable. I love my child and I will do whatever it is to be the best parent I can be. I have his best interest at heart and I will not willingly hurt him.
When I say I do not put him in his crib to cry it means I do not sleep train him. He sleeps curled up next to me in my bed the way babies are meant to sleep. You could argue; SIDS! Mommas Boy!! blahblahblah but I don’t care. In Asia they sleep with their babies and they have the lowest rate of SIDS in the world. Even cavemen didn’t let babies cry it out because that would give away their location to predators. Babies are born wanting and needing their mothers. It is their survival instinct. I do not believe trying to program them otherwise is healthy. Also sleeping with your baby makes breastfeeding easier.
I nourish my baby the way nature intended. (You could also say its the way God intended, but I am not religious.) I have breasts for a reason and they produce the most amazing milk for babies. Breast milk is the miracle drug. I read somewhere about a radio station that was talking about eating only one thing for the rest of your life and they concluded breast milk would be the best thing for its whole nutrition. Nothing can replace breast milk no matter how hard you try. Breasts are amazing at knowing just what the baby needs. The fore milk is watery to quench babies thirst about feeding and then fatty hind milk flows next to keep baby full. Im not knocking you if you formula feed, but if you chose not to breastfeeding willingly then your not doing what is best for your child. (IN MY OPINION) Formula does not produce antibodies for you child and it does not adjust to your child’s nutritional needs. Formula fed babies are often sleepy after eating for the same reason we are sleepy after a large meal. The overload of fats, carbs, and sugar make all the blood rush to the gut and often times the babies are gassy and the can go longer between feedings. Breast milk takes 90 minuets to digest and is gentle on babies tummies.( in most cases) And I also believe that forcing babies to be weaned from the breast at 6 months is not natural. That is the average for babies in America. All other places in the world it is beyond 2 years. Toddlers also benefit from the antibodies in mothers milk, not from cow breast milk.
Keeping my son WHOLE:
I did not circumcise my son. I carried him for almost 9 long months and did everything to protects him. I would not pop him out, hand him over and tell someone to alter him. He was perfect the way he was born. No medical association in the world recommends circumcision. And it also goes against my belief that I would never do anything to harm my son intentionally. Birth is traumatic enough, why would you put them through that?!?! It boggles me! You could say, “Well I want him to look like his father.” Well if you son is staring at his fathers penis….you got other issues to deal with! Nuff said.
WOW! That was long…. Now will you still be my friend? =D I promise I wont judge you! =D Like I said earlier, its a personal decision how you parent your child. If your complete opposite, good for you, I just don’t agree with it! But I will still be your friend!